Well, it being the New Year and all, it's time for my favorite annual New Year's tradition! Yes, it's time once again to count out all the pennies from the can on my bedside table! I've been doing this for years now, and I've got all them pennies saved up and locked away in a special bank account THAT'S ONLY FOR PENNIES! I don't mean to brag, but by now I've amassed literally DOZENS of dollars! So you can see, this is one tradition that is not only educational but lucrative as well.

It's so simple even a child could do it- you just sleeve them up in these little paper tubes in quantities of fifty, and each completed tube is then worth fifty cents. You can either count them out in ten stacks of five pennies each, or five stacks of ten pennies each. I guess you could also just count out fifty at a time, but I bet that'd be waaay too much work. You can also roll up nickels- worth $2 a roll, or even dimes, at a whopping $5 per roll! Legally I think you can roll up quarters as well, but nobody has that many quarters just laying around. You'd have to have, I don't know, literally dozens of the fuckers.

If you pay attention while you count, you can learn some pretty interesting facts. For instance, I can tell you that they made pennies in every year so far in the 2000's, every year in the 90's, every year in the 80's except 1983, and in 1972, '73, '74, '76, '78, '79, and 1962. Also, they've gotten a lot better at making pennies nowadays. You know how bright and shiny a new 2007 penny is? Well, pennies weren't always made to such a standard! Back in the '80's they made 'em all dull and bleah-colored and sometimes with all this greenish crud on them- just like the cars they used to make back then.

Well, I've about got all my change rolled up now, so me and my eight dollars and fifty cents are rolling off down to the bank!