If you go to the same gym I go to, your only avenues for mental stimulation while treadmilling or fake bicycling or whatever are:
1) Watch CNN with the sound off.
2) Flip through month(s)-old copies of People Magazine, Better Homes and Gardens, Rolling Stone, and/or Martha Stewart Living.
As watching CNN without sound is only marginally more interesting than watching CNN with sound, naturally I generally gravitate towards Option 2, so I can catch up on all the latest news like how heavily favored Senator Clinton is in next year's Democratic Primaries. Basically, she has a lock on the nomination, and will face Mitt Romney in the general election. Well so anyway that's why I was reading an article about the long-defunct snooze-rock band Luna, and learned that it was the band members' firmly-held belief that you could tell how people at their shows make love by watching how they dance.
"Whaa?" I thought. "Preposterous! Who could possibly believe that malarkey? People dancing at a Luna show???"
But it got me to musing about how people dance at shows. You always have the Hippy Girl doing the Hippy Twirl, of course, and the pogo-ers, the hip-shakers, fist-shakers, toe-tappers and knee-slappers, the headbangers and their more sedate cousins the headbobbers. You get those creepy dudes who pretend to be dancing but really are just trying to cop a surrepticious feel. There are tons of people who just stand around like so many catatonic frogs, way too cool and/or sober to do something gauche like dance. There's always people talking on cel phones at concerts: I do not know what the deal is with THOSE people. If you're at a show worth dancing at, you dance. You don't call someone and tell them about it. Myself, I'm partial to the school of thought where you throw yourself into the music and dance with wild abandon. If you don't rock out from time to time, YOU MAY ALREADY BE DEAD. When I bust a move, it stays busted. Now, I'll admit that I'm not the most co-ordinated gent in the world. Especially after a cocktail or two, you know, to loosen up. In fact, it generally wouldn't be inaccurate to describe my show-time dance technique as "Awkward, clumsy thrashing about, no discernable rhythm, singing/hollering off-key and loudly. Sweaty. Usually drunk." Moreover, I---
Hey, wait! th- that EXACTLY describes my love-making style!
I-I probably shouldn't have just said that!
(bonus points for readers who were thinking that when I'm dancing at concerts: a.) I'm not wearing any pants or b.) I'm dancing by myself)
1) Watch CNN with the sound off.
2) Flip through month(s)-old copies of People Magazine, Better Homes and Gardens, Rolling Stone, and/or Martha Stewart Living.
As watching CNN without sound is only marginally more interesting than watching CNN with sound, naturally I generally gravitate towards Option 2, so I can catch up on all the latest news like how heavily favored Senator Clinton is in next year's Democratic Primaries. Basically, she has a lock on the nomination, and will face Mitt Romney in the general election. Well so anyway that's why I was reading an article about the long-defunct snooze-rock band Luna, and learned that it was the band members' firmly-held belief that you could tell how people at their shows make love by watching how they dance.
"Whaa?" I thought. "Preposterous! Who could possibly believe that malarkey? People dancing at a Luna show???"
But it got me to musing about how people dance at shows. You always have the Hippy Girl doing the Hippy Twirl, of course, and the pogo-ers, the hip-shakers, fist-shakers, toe-tappers and knee-slappers, the headbangers and their more sedate cousins the headbobbers. You get those creepy dudes who pretend to be dancing but really are just trying to cop a surrepticious feel. There are tons of people who just stand around like so many catatonic frogs, way too cool and/or sober to do something gauche like dance. There's always people talking on cel phones at concerts: I do not know what the deal is with THOSE people. If you're at a show worth dancing at, you dance. You don't call someone and tell them about it. Myself, I'm partial to the school of thought where you throw yourself into the music and dance with wild abandon. If you don't rock out from time to time, YOU MAY ALREADY BE DEAD. When I bust a move, it stays busted. Now, I'll admit that I'm not the most co-ordinated gent in the world. Especially after a cocktail or two, you know, to loosen up. In fact, it generally wouldn't be inaccurate to describe my show-time dance technique as "Awkward, clumsy thrashing about, no discernable rhythm, singing/hollering off-key and loudly. Sweaty. Usually drunk." Moreover, I---
Hey, wait! th- that EXACTLY describes my love-making style!
I-I probably shouldn't have just said that!
(bonus points for readers who were thinking that when I'm dancing at concerts: a.) I'm not wearing any pants or b.) I'm dancing by myself)
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